Introducing...

We'd like everyone to meet Baby Grace. She doesn't have a middle name yet but we're confident we'll think of one before she makes her official debut in about 9 weeks.

Facebook killed the Blogger star...

My friend Aimee (I didn't link her blog b/c I'm not sure she'd like a world of strangers traipsing through pictures of her kiddos) once posted that facebook is killing her blog. After an unfortunate case of insomnia last night I can't help but say that's true -- about my blog...not hers. It seems the facebook status box has been a convenient way to get out the ideas without worrying about their development. Since I'm into posterity I decided I'd post some more of the memorable statuses here -- more for my memory than for your entertainment -- I'm just cool like that. Any italics are my thoughts now -- today -- after the fact.

8/26 is thinking bubble wrap is the only way to keep two little boys from engaging in "brotherly love" (wrestling) when they are both supposed to take it easy and protect stitches and such...

8/23 just caught the boys giving each other showers using the nasty standing water from yesterday's rain that was caught in a toy outside. GROSS!!! Really -- I was worried Sam would get another parasite...that's how he caught the last one.

8/17 best part of jacks surgery? watching him "fly over the sea" (his words) while hiccuping so hard he almost fell over!! Oh my! Wish I woulda gotten this on video!!

8/10 you know it's going to be a good day when your toddler walks into the kitchen saying, "YUCK!" You turn around assuming a rogue booger must be stuck to his hand only to discover he is in fact using his own poo as hand lotion. Good way to start the week, son!

8/3 house is beginning to resemble the UFC. Sam fish-hooked Jack and gouged him in the eye as Jack body-slammed him to the ground and then sat on him while he "squeezed his guts." Both giggled through the entire episode. I love my little boys!!

would like to thank her youngest son for losing her bank card somewhere in Target. That makes shopping easy for the next 10 days while I wait for a new one since I had to cancel the lost one.

7/23 is hungry...and cravin' breakfast food. too bad shipley's isn't open...blame it on CT (the hunger not the lack of donuts) maybe this habit would explain the recent weight gain...

7/14 wondering if the "b" in crumb is silent then why don't we pronounce "crumble" as "crummel"? Deep thoughts from Valerie while folding the mound of laundry taller than Jack.

7/6 oh terrible two's, you are my nemesis; you arrived earlier than I was expecting you sneaky devil and it seems I've forgotten all the tricks from the last time...

7/1 woke up to a kid with blue lips and vomit. Who said being a stay-at-home mom was dull???

6/29 Jack just asked Luke what he was going to watch on tv and before Luke could respond Jack answered "your mother." My thoughts? BURN; how proper of him; ooopppsss -- maybe I should lay off the "your mom" responses...

6/12 has decided to fire the maid. seriously -- the laundry is piling up and the kitchen is a disaster. OH WAIT...those are my jobs...dang it!

6/10 9AM dermatology appointment for your toddler -- eleventy billion dollars; watching medical professionals attempt to keep a straight face while said toddler picks nose and eats findings -- HILARIOUS!!! (I know, I know...I should work on the nose picking part...we're a work-in-progress around here)

5/22 never fear, Jack slayed Goliath and the Philistines this morning. It was quite the battle.

5/14 is watching Jack attempt to baptize his brother in the kiddie pool. He's holding Sam's nose with one hand while trying to force his head back with the other, all the while saying, "I baptize you in the name of the Lord."

5/10 forgot to wear make-up to church this morning. Proof positive that pregnancy kills brain cells.

5/5 shouldn't be allowed to speak to other people. I just left a message for Jack's cardiologist that ended with, "the sooner the report is faxed the better it will be for everyone." What exactly does that mean? Am I gunnin' for her???

4/20 is thinking that instead of cleaning the kitchen, all the dishes should be thrown away and new ones purchased.

4/2 Jack came home from school talking about his blood eyes behind his white eyes. Should I be concerned??

3/27 my 16 month laughs hysterically at his older brother's flatulence. Anyone know how I can pump a little estrogen in my house to even things out a bit?? we found out we were expecting chicken tart 2 days later...

3/23 Sam is walking around the house carrying a fire-poker. Think it's time I parent and leave fb alone??

3/22 finally got poor sicky Sam-o to rest a little. Oh and in case you are wondering - Jack didn't want a "waterbooger" for dinner. Not that I blame him...

3/20 is exhausted. Hauled the boys around shopping with my mom and sis. Jack sang "Let's Play Bite My Brother" the entire time we were in Hobby Lobby...

3/19 wishes Jack didn't get carsick...ever...and especially not as I pull him from the truck for baseball practice.

3/18 is so glad Sam needed up in the middle of the night so he could roar for an hour....I was telling Sam "night night", so he would pat my head and say, "night night mama rooooooarrrrr". we too are not friends today...

3/17 is takin' the boys to the mall. must run off some energy before I bury someone under the swingset...It's funny everyone assumes this is a joke

3/13 tally for today -- one bite from youngest almost ended in blood, oldest son using pile of laundry as cushion for jumping off couch. And it's not even lunch..

1/19 Jack just ran in my room, asking for the water on to brush his teeth...in nothing but a belt with a screwdriver tucked in the waistband...

1/17 thinks fort-building days turn her house into a Lord of the Flies experiment - after the store found Jack asleep on the couch with a half-eaten bag of dorito's

That's all...I'm sure there are more but I'm getting bored copying and pasting...

some new things

1. I found new stretch marks this weekend while on vacation. I assumed, stupidly I guess, that since this was my 3rd baby I'd be in the clear on the "new"stretch marks...at least until we get closer to the end. I was wrong...

2. I now think it is entirely possible that a baby can explode from your belly button. There was more than one time this weekend, while waddling around the French Quarter like a live public health advertisement for birth control, that I was convinced little miss would burst right out onto the pavement. This probably explains the new stretch marks. I kept trying to convince her that if she moved down just a teeny tiny bit there would be more room for her -- her brothers have already stretched that part of my abdomen beyond repair. Apparently she wants to be a little trailblazer...

3. We have a name? I say that with uncertainty more than declaration because we aren't 100% positive. Right now we are unpacking the name, trying on all the variations, seeing if it fits. After we've had time to wear the new off a little and to make sure it's perfect then we'll tell.

4. We have chosen a nursery. Declaration! It's from babiesrus...the first one we looked at.

5. I'm nesting? Back to questions... I never did this with the boys and I "think" it's too early to do with LM but I'm there nonetheless. So either it's nesting or I'm crazy. Don't vote on which you think it is...

6. I can't clean the bathtub any more. I can't tie shoes any more. I can barely get things off the floor any more. I still have 10 weeks to go. It's gonna be a long 10 weeks.

7. Jack told me this morning, "Mom, I wanna be one of Jesus's Christians. What's a Christian?" After my first try at explaining this (Jesus comes into your heart), Jack said, "Jesus is in my heart. He came down from Heaven and we had a sleepover...except he was in my body." I had to try that explanation again... Apparently I didn't do a satisfactory job -- he then told me "I'll just tell dad when he gets home." Fail...

8. Sam and I are still at odds with the diaper situation. On the upside, I'm considering opening my own carpet cleaning business. I have experience now...and most of my house is tile. He can't help it that he has his favorite "spots" if you know what I mean...