The Scene: Our backyard around 6ish. Luke is grilling yummy jalapeno basil porkchops; Jack is playing pirate (HILARIOUS face that kiddo makes) and Sam is hanging with mommy on the patio. Luke and I are chatting nonchalantly about the height of the grass -- it's a little amazonian since we've been out of town.
Suddenly we hear "Knock Knock"
I look to Luke thinking it's a little girl here to sell us stuff. Before I can react our neighbor opens the gate and comes into the backyard. Ginger begins barking furiously
Me: WAIT WAIT WAIT, GINGER NO NO
Neighbor: It's okay he knows me (I think to myself "you don't know HER obviously)
Luke: yeah but she gets a little territorial about the backyard
Neighbor: I have a question for you. Did you turn on our sprinkler today?
Me: no...???
Neighbor: because we are sure it was off when we left earlier today
Me: I noticed it was on for a long time...when I got home from lunch at noon it was on and then still on when we returned from swim lessons at 3.
Neighbor: yeah we turned it on to fix the brown spot we have but we know we turned it off. weird. are you sure you didn't turn it on?
Me: yeah...we didn't do it. that is weird.
on and on this goes for about ten minutes. then neighbor leaves convinced that either we didn't turn on the sprinkler for her or that we are lying, luke and I aren't sure which.
I should clarify -- this isn't a sprinkler that you buy at wal-mart and attach to a hose. This was their in-ground sprinkler system. So we have to ask: does this happen often -- neighbors turning on one another's sprinkler systems?
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
...
Today I wept...wept for the mortality of my son. I stared deep into the face of his humanity and wept. I wept for my inability as a mother to protect him as I should; I wept for the errs in his path; I wept for the stumbling blocks I placed in his way when I truly believed I was clearing the road ahead. And then I wept for being so human-minded -- for clinging to Christ myself and diving deep to become the mother my son so desperately needs all the while thinking that the term "primary faith trainer" meant "primary faith giver"; for assuming that enough songs and stories and appropriate cartoons would be sufficient to stave off the enemy that is hungry for my son; for praying that I would be molded but failing to realize that my son's molding would be done by The Potter not by me.
Someone called my son a sinner yesterday and while some piece of me has always known this is true to have the word said aloud struck me to my core. For the first time I was afraid for him, for his life, for his death. And then everso calmly and rationally my gentle giant of a husband gathered up my fears, wiped away the tears and refocused my eyes of the Giver of Life. The beautiful man that has grown before my eyes into a giant of faith guided me back to my Savior, back to the foot of the Cross, back to the basic truths of my faith. Thank you God for answering prayers I didn't even know I should pray, for meeting needs I didn't know existed, for solving problems I couldn't even see. Thank you for my husband, for his gentle spirit, his unending grace, his unconditional love and for his commitment to You and to our family.
This evening my spirit is raw but I have hope. I look into the glittering eyes of my son and the cold hard facts of his imperfection are present in my mind yet I can't help but glory in the knowledge that he has been called of God for a righteous purpose. My enemy wants to claim this day as a victory for himself but God will not let that happen. In my arrogance I failed to be faithful but my God did not fail in His faithfulness; He acknowledged my questions on mortality and sin then He showed me His fingerprints on my baby-who's more of a bigboy's being. Lord thank you for providence; thank you for faithfulness; thank you for new mercies each morning; thank you Lord for your infinite nature and your complexity that stretches me, sometimes confuses me but always amazes and provides for me.
Someone called my son a sinner yesterday and while some piece of me has always known this is true to have the word said aloud struck me to my core. For the first time I was afraid for him, for his life, for his death. And then everso calmly and rationally my gentle giant of a husband gathered up my fears, wiped away the tears and refocused my eyes of the Giver of Life. The beautiful man that has grown before my eyes into a giant of faith guided me back to my Savior, back to the foot of the Cross, back to the basic truths of my faith. Thank you God for answering prayers I didn't even know I should pray, for meeting needs I didn't know existed, for solving problems I couldn't even see. Thank you for my husband, for his gentle spirit, his unending grace, his unconditional love and for his commitment to You and to our family.
This evening my spirit is raw but I have hope. I look into the glittering eyes of my son and the cold hard facts of his imperfection are present in my mind yet I can't help but glory in the knowledge that he has been called of God for a righteous purpose. My enemy wants to claim this day as a victory for himself but God will not let that happen. In my arrogance I failed to be faithful but my God did not fail in His faithfulness; He acknowledged my questions on mortality and sin then He showed me His fingerprints on my baby-who's more of a bigboy's being. Lord thank you for providence; thank you for faithfulness; thank you for new mercies each morning; thank you Lord for your infinite nature and your complexity that stretches me, sometimes confuses me but always amazes and provides for me.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
It's time for Veggieta -a-a-a-a-a-a-les!!!!
We are super veggietales fans around the Pearson house and we just found out GREAT news!!! Veggietales is coming to Houston in September for a LIVE show! Yippee!!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Rain Rain Go Away...
Yuck! It has been raining here all day -- started last night -- and has no postponed a dinner grill-out twice. Not to mention that trying to keep a very VERY active 3 year old occupied indoors this long is starting to wear me out! Here's hoping for sunny skies tomorrow!!!
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Two steps forward and one step back
My mom used to have a magnet on the fridge that read, "when you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on." While the magnet has gone on to the giant fridge in the sky the words still pop in my head --usually after I have informed Jack that he is killing me or that I've had enough. No other time has this motto needed to resonate more soundly than in Jack's current state of affairs.
Jack decided of his own accord that he wanted to potty-train; of course he chose the exact day we brought Sam home from the hospital to give this new endeavor a go. I wanted to wait until this summer started, putting him closer to 3 when we began. But as with all things in Jack's life he chose to do it in his own time. He actually did very well, going from diapers to bigboy pants in about 4 months and we have now enjoyed about 4.5 months of diaper-free Jack. At least we did enjoy this...until last week. Suddenly Jack has decided to regress and for the life of me I cannot determine the cause. He has had at least one accident every other day for two weeks; the night accidents are understandable -- he's little and plays hard during the day -- and while these accidents didn't use to happen I'm not worried at the minor trend. The concerning issue is the sudden increase of day-time accidents and the coinciding of these accidents with an increase in thumb-sucking. While I have zero experience in child psychology I can't help but think that this regression is the manifestation of some emotion with which Jack is unable to process. My initial reaction was confirmed last night when Jack voluntarily went to the bathroom then emerged to get his step stool only to return to the bathroom to poop in his pants. Uggghh!!
For whatever reason Jack must feel that he isn't getting the attention he feels he needs. Believe me when I say this is frustrating for all of us. I am tired of cleaning out pants, I am worried about Jack and the sudden change in behavior and Jack is embarassed about his accidents.
So right now we are all just hanging on. I am attempting to lavish Jack with more attention than normal, hoping that attention paid to him outside the bathroom will translate into a realization in him that he doesn't need to have accidents to get attention. My goal is smother him -- not literally of course -- but with attention. I can only imagine how difficult a transition it must be for the little guy to have to share the spotlight with Sam (especially with as cranky as Sam has been lately). So far no accidents today. We'll just take it one day at a time...and hope our knot holds out.
Jack decided of his own accord that he wanted to potty-train; of course he chose the exact day we brought Sam home from the hospital to give this new endeavor a go. I wanted to wait until this summer started, putting him closer to 3 when we began. But as with all things in Jack's life he chose to do it in his own time. He actually did very well, going from diapers to bigboy pants in about 4 months and we have now enjoyed about 4.5 months of diaper-free Jack. At least we did enjoy this...until last week. Suddenly Jack has decided to regress and for the life of me I cannot determine the cause. He has had at least one accident every other day for two weeks; the night accidents are understandable -- he's little and plays hard during the day -- and while these accidents didn't use to happen I'm not worried at the minor trend. The concerning issue is the sudden increase of day-time accidents and the coinciding of these accidents with an increase in thumb-sucking. While I have zero experience in child psychology I can't help but think that this regression is the manifestation of some emotion with which Jack is unable to process. My initial reaction was confirmed last night when Jack voluntarily went to the bathroom then emerged to get his step stool only to return to the bathroom to poop in his pants. Uggghh!!
For whatever reason Jack must feel that he isn't getting the attention he feels he needs. Believe me when I say this is frustrating for all of us. I am tired of cleaning out pants, I am worried about Jack and the sudden change in behavior and Jack is embarassed about his accidents.
So right now we are all just hanging on. I am attempting to lavish Jack with more attention than normal, hoping that attention paid to him outside the bathroom will translate into a realization in him that he doesn't need to have accidents to get attention. My goal is smother him -- not literally of course -- but with attention. I can only imagine how difficult a transition it must be for the little guy to have to share the spotlight with Sam (especially with as cranky as Sam has been lately). So far no accidents today. We'll just take it one day at a time...and hope our knot holds out.
A time for every purpose
As I sat watching Jack in swim lessons yesterday I was reminded of Ecclesiastes 3 “to every thing there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven…a time to embrace and a time to refrain.” Actually if truth be told I first thought of the song but I know the song was based on that passage … Anyway, the reason this particular truth found it’s way into my already overcrowded brain was that as I watched Jack very obediently listen to his instructor I was also watching his one little classmate scream at the top of her lungs for mommy every time she was asked to participate and I was watching the two slightly older students in the class next to Jack cling to the pool side and scream for mommy (and occasionally get out of the pool and make a break for the door). All the while I couldn’t help but wonder what made these parents force their children to endure what sounded like torture. Just as I was about to settle into my judgment phase of these well-meaning but in my opinion seriously mis-guided parents I was reminded of my interaction with my own child only moments before. Jack had not wanted to go to swim lessons that day. He cried from the moment he awoke from nap until we pulled into the parking lot. I tried everything to get him to stop: I cajoled, I called Dad for a pep-talk, I scolded and shamed (“you said you wanted to do this and I paid a lot of money for these – you have to fulfill your commitment!”). I did everything I could to get Jack excited about swimming. Why did I push so hard? To be frank, I pushed because I knew 1) the cause of Jack’s reticence was exhaustion from the trip this past weekend and 2) Jack would be excited once we were in view of the facility. I was right on both if any is keeping score in the game “Do I know my son or what?”
But this led me to wonder at what point to do you push and at what point to do you surrender? Perhaps the parents I was ready to sit in judgment of (I know – an issue in its own right) were doing what I had done – rationalizing that their children would be excited about it when it was over; perhaps these children had been excited to go and gave no indication of their trepidation before class began. It’s such a fine line we walk as parents: to know when to push our little birds from the nest because it’s good for them and when to just let them be. My final thought as I sat there watching (it’s only a 30 minute class and my synapses don’t fire quite as rapidly as they used to) was a question: how will I know when to push and when not to? I suppose the answer to this question is the same as all the other parenting questions I have: God will have to let me know because as time and experience inform me at every turn, I have no idea what I am doing on my own.
But this led me to wonder at what point to do you push and at what point to do you surrender? Perhaps the parents I was ready to sit in judgment of (I know – an issue in its own right) were doing what I had done – rationalizing that their children would be excited about it when it was over; perhaps these children had been excited to go and gave no indication of their trepidation before class began. It’s such a fine line we walk as parents: to know when to push our little birds from the nest because it’s good for them and when to just let them be. My final thought as I sat there watching (it’s only a 30 minute class and my synapses don’t fire quite as rapidly as they used to) was a question: how will I know when to push and when not to? I suppose the answer to this question is the same as all the other parenting questions I have: God will have to let me know because as time and experience inform me at every turn, I have no idea what I am doing on my own.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Just say cheese!
I'll admit it -- I love having the boys pictures taken. I have fallen victim to the adage "they are only X age once" so I have a ridiculous number of pictures of my little men. In tandem to this I must admit that while I have aspirations of being a shutterbug I am not. Yes, I take more pictures of the boys than I would have previously impossible to take of two individuals but these pictures are typical snapshots; some are out of focus, many are plagued by weird lighting and more often than not the boys' expressions aren't quite what I had in mind. Of course, even in this digital age of picture-choosing, I print and keep every single image -- my documentation of ineptitude for later I suppose. But it is for this very reason that I have so many professional pictures taken of the boys. The first year of life I have portraits made at 2,4,6 and 9 months. Then I have portraits made on birthdays after that. Lately I have also had Christmas portraits taken (which falls almost directly on Jack's half-birthday) but I am thinking of letting that tradition die in lieu of more candid snapshots. The first year portraits are a mix of studios depending on the flow of finances at the time; if we have extra money that month I will take the boys to PicturePeople -- I love their casual approach and the fact they use free roaming cameras; if money is tighter in a given month I will take the boys to JCPenney -- can't beat $3.99 a sheet and a free 8x10!
Lately I haven't been extremely pleased with either place. JCPenney doesn't hire real genuine photographers at most of their locations so while the samples are usually very good chances are your photographer will be nothing more than a trained camera operator capable of little more than pushing a button. PicturePeople takes great photos but they tend to all start looking the same with a rather bland background and standard poses -- great for a once in a while but it's getting difficult for me to tell the difference between photo sessions -- that and PP is REALLY expensive (or at least it can get that way!).
That's when I stumbled upon Kiddie Kandids or perhaps I should say they stumbled upon me. I was in Babies R Us doing some recon work in the stroller department when I was approached by a woman who complimented me on my pretty baby. I thanked her and then she asked if she could take a picture of him. I have to admit I was kinda -- okay really -- creeped out. But she went on to tell me of KK and that she was practicing on little ones. I agreed and ended up with some super cute shots of Sam for free and a coupon to return. I know this was totally a gimmick to get me to come back but it worked. I made an appointment for Jack's 3rd birthday pictures and decided that if the session was a flop I wouldn't order any pics and would make an appointment with my friendly neighborhood photog (she's actually in Pearland but who's fact-checking here!). The pictures came out great! We ended up buying a larger package than we intended but we walked out with 10 sheets of pictures for $90. WHAT A DEAL!! The photog was great with Jack during the session and during picture choosing time. One of my favorite parts was getting the pics that day -- I hate waiting for them to come in!
KK is a good blend of JCP and PP -- good photogs with an eye for shots, decent prices, immediate prints, free online viewing, cd of the pics for me, a free bonus club that gives coupons on birthdays, no sitting fee and the ability to make appointments online. The only negative was that the camera is still mounted like at JCP so the photog can't chase your toddler around the studio like at PP -- but it is a better system than JCP. Probably the best part of KK for me was its location -- inside Babies R Us. The branch of PP that is closest to me is East through the perpetual mess that is I10 and really I have about had it with JCP and don't want to go to the one in Katy anymore.
So...while I know this matters NONE to those without kiddos I thought I would let the other parents know about this place. Honestly I wouldn't have ever tried it had they not bribed me with free pics of Sam. OH -- and if you are interested in trying the place out, I have referral coupons that give you a free 8x12 just for going once -- just have to be used by 8/25.
Here are some samples.
Sam's free photo.
Jack's Birthday photo -- one of many!
Lately I haven't been extremely pleased with either place. JCPenney doesn't hire real genuine photographers at most of their locations so while the samples are usually very good chances are your photographer will be nothing more than a trained camera operator capable of little more than pushing a button. PicturePeople takes great photos but they tend to all start looking the same with a rather bland background and standard poses -- great for a once in a while but it's getting difficult for me to tell the difference between photo sessions -- that and PP is REALLY expensive (or at least it can get that way!).
That's when I stumbled upon Kiddie Kandids or perhaps I should say they stumbled upon me. I was in Babies R Us doing some recon work in the stroller department when I was approached by a woman who complimented me on my pretty baby. I thanked her and then she asked if she could take a picture of him. I have to admit I was kinda -- okay really -- creeped out. But she went on to tell me of KK and that she was practicing on little ones. I agreed and ended up with some super cute shots of Sam for free and a coupon to return. I know this was totally a gimmick to get me to come back but it worked. I made an appointment for Jack's 3rd birthday pictures and decided that if the session was a flop I wouldn't order any pics and would make an appointment with my friendly neighborhood photog (she's actually in Pearland but who's fact-checking here!). The pictures came out great! We ended up buying a larger package than we intended but we walked out with 10 sheets of pictures for $90. WHAT A DEAL!! The photog was great with Jack during the session and during picture choosing time. One of my favorite parts was getting the pics that day -- I hate waiting for them to come in!
KK is a good blend of JCP and PP -- good photogs with an eye for shots, decent prices, immediate prints, free online viewing, cd of the pics for me, a free bonus club that gives coupons on birthdays, no sitting fee and the ability to make appointments online. The only negative was that the camera is still mounted like at JCP so the photog can't chase your toddler around the studio like at PP -- but it is a better system than JCP. Probably the best part of KK for me was its location -- inside Babies R Us. The branch of PP that is closest to me is East through the perpetual mess that is I10 and really I have about had it with JCP and don't want to go to the one in Katy anymore.
So...while I know this matters NONE to those without kiddos I thought I would let the other parents know about this place. Honestly I wouldn't have ever tried it had they not bribed me with free pics of Sam. OH -- and if you are interested in trying the place out, I have referral coupons that give you a free 8x12 just for going once -- just have to be used by 8/25.
Here are some samples.
Sam's free photo.
Jack's Birthday photo -- one of many!
Monday, July 14, 2008
These are a few of our favorite things
As the boys get older it is so much fun to watch their little personalities bloom. To commemorate this blossoming I thought I would take a moment to list their favorite things!
Jack doing what he loves -- swimming and playing with his water guns!
Jack
* all things sports -- baseball, football, basketball, soccer, tennis -- you name it and we probably have the equipment for it around the house and Jack would love to show you how to use it
* music -- everything becomes a drum or a trombone or a piano or a guitar for Jack to play a tune for all to hear
* strawberry flavor -- he hates the real thing because of the seeds but loves strawberry kiwi juice, strawberry jello and fruit snacks.
* firemen -- he tells us all the time that he is going to be a fireman when he grows up
* swimming -- even though he isn't very good at it, that kid would stay in the pool all day!
* animals -- dogs, horses and cows specifically -- he even told Papa Mark that he wanted cows in a barn for his birthday
* school time -- I have no idea why but the child loves to be quizzed on his letters with flashcards!
* muscle shirts -- no words for this...I actually find it odd...
* two particular Bible stories -- David and Goliath (or as Jack calls it "Dave and the Giant Pickle" -- he loves walking around saying "You come at me with a spear and a sword but I come to you in the name of the Lord.") and Jonah (on this one we get lots of lessons from Jack about how Jonah didn't listen to God's instructions but God gave him a second chance to make a better choice.)
Sam
* bottles -- try as I may to switch to sippies, he will not let go of the "ba-ba" (yes he knows the name!)
* sweet potatoes -- don't try to feed the kid anything else! He is actually starting to turn a little orange because of these...
* Jack -- talk about hero worship
* Ginger -- nothing (besides Jack) can make him giggle louder and longer than when she gets on the floor to play with him
* stackable rings -- hours of fun are to be had with these
* showers -- no bath-time fun for this little guy -- he prefers the shower
* rolling -- still not crawling and apparently he doesn't see the need...rolling gets him where he wants to go and he can still hold treasures
* raspberries -- blowing them not eating them -- just his little way of communicating
Well there you go -- the Gruesome Twosome in a nutshell! Here are some pictures of the boys being boys!
Sam has rolled himself under the coffetable in search of more toys!
Jack doing what he loves -- swimming and playing with his water guns!
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
On the schedule for today...
Ugggghhh...I hate schedules. I loathe schedules. I abhor schedules. That's why I chose a career that made a schedule for me. I didn't have to think about it...I just did my thing and let the bells run my life. Of course I was also the teacher that complained about the lack of time to get a leisurely cup of coffee or take a trip to the ladies' room or have a conversation beyond, "Good morning, how are you?"
Now that I am home I realize the value of the schedule; with this of course I realize my complete incompetency in the schedule making arena. Should I limit tv time to 30 minutes or one hour? Should we play outside in the morning or after nap? When should we have school time (Jack's favorite time of day is sitting at his table and doing his "school work" -- practicing his letters, drawing shapes, reading, etc)? When should I schedule my errands? Does it matter that playgroup doesn't exactly fit? On and on these questions run through my head.
Yes I could say it all doesn't really matter that much but then I fear we would spend our days plopped on the couch watching entirely too much Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and Veggietales and not nearly enough time living. While it's true that this schedule thing is outside the comfort zone of my laissez-faire approach to life it seems to be one of the truly important things for stay-at-home mommies and their kiddos. I have been tweaking this darn schedule now since the beginning of June and still haven't gotten it quite right -- and I know that in about 2 weeks the whole thing will be thrown out the window for swim lessons. Maybe I'll get things figured out by fall...
Now that I am home I realize the value of the schedule; with this of course I realize my complete incompetency in the schedule making arena. Should I limit tv time to 30 minutes or one hour? Should we play outside in the morning or after nap? When should we have school time (Jack's favorite time of day is sitting at his table and doing his "school work" -- practicing his letters, drawing shapes, reading, etc)? When should I schedule my errands? Does it matter that playgroup doesn't exactly fit? On and on these questions run through my head.
Yes I could say it all doesn't really matter that much but then I fear we would spend our days plopped on the couch watching entirely too much Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and Veggietales and not nearly enough time living. While it's true that this schedule thing is outside the comfort zone of my laissez-faire approach to life it seems to be one of the truly important things for stay-at-home mommies and their kiddos. I have been tweaking this darn schedule now since the beginning of June and still haven't gotten it quite right -- and I know that in about 2 weeks the whole thing will be thrown out the window for swim lessons. Maybe I'll get things figured out by fall...
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Doctor, Doctor...
For those that know me well, it is no surprise that I have struggled with my health for basically my entire life; it began with the Crohn's diagnosis in junior high, the reappearance of a heart murmur that had been supposedly outgrown, then went to pre-eclampsia with Jack and the long-lasting ramifications of that ugly disease. I am once again struggling to control my body processes -- namely again my blood pressure. Having a striking genetic predisposition to the condition, I am ultra-conservative in my monitoring and treatment of it. Long story short after visits to two different doctors I have come to a rather sad conclusion. Modern society dictates that that we should all be doctors. In reality that it is what it seems my physicians expected of me -- for me to walk in and not only talk symptoms but offer treatment solutions as well, you know like in the commercials, "Ask your doctor if drug X is right for you." My response is how should I know? I went to school to become an English teacher -- and I was pretty good at that job. Luke went to school to become a chemical engineer and he is pretty good at his job. Doesn't it seem logical that the same should hold true for a doctor?
Another shocking revelation I had in this entire process was how obsessed we all are with appearance -- even those in the medical community. It's a rather obvious statement that plastic surgeons are obsessed with appearance -- it's what they do. But my general practitioner is an entirely different scenario. For some inexplicable reason I have been unable to lose the baby weight from Sam; moreover I have actually gained about 15 pounds since his birth despite a rather strict diet and exercise regimen (I am determined to get back in my pre-baby pants sooner rather than later). This was actually the impetus for my visit to Dr. N -- why can't I lose weight and why all of a sudden are my feet and hands swollen?? Her response: have you considered lap-band and an anti-depressant? Really??? That's where she went?!! I am not concerned with my lack of weight loss because of appearances. I know that weight is very closely linked with high blood pressure and I know that I am already at risk to develop the condition as I was medicating for it this time last year. My concern for the weight loss was so that I can be healthy and active for my children. But Dr. N seemed only to focus on the aesthetic aspect of my question.
The entire process has been extremely frustrating. As you can see, it's time to find another doctor for me. One who is a little more concerned with health and a little less concerned about her bank account.
Another shocking revelation I had in this entire process was how obsessed we all are with appearance -- even those in the medical community. It's a rather obvious statement that plastic surgeons are obsessed with appearance -- it's what they do. But my general practitioner is an entirely different scenario. For some inexplicable reason I have been unable to lose the baby weight from Sam; moreover I have actually gained about 15 pounds since his birth despite a rather strict diet and exercise regimen (I am determined to get back in my pre-baby pants sooner rather than later). This was actually the impetus for my visit to Dr. N -- why can't I lose weight and why all of a sudden are my feet and hands swollen?? Her response: have you considered lap-band and an anti-depressant? Really??? That's where she went?!! I am not concerned with my lack of weight loss because of appearances. I know that weight is very closely linked with high blood pressure and I know that I am already at risk to develop the condition as I was medicating for it this time last year. My concern for the weight loss was so that I can be healthy and active for my children. But Dr. N seemed only to focus on the aesthetic aspect of my question.
The entire process has been extremely frustrating. As you can see, it's time to find another doctor for me. One who is a little more concerned with health and a little less concerned about her bank account.
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