What's it gonna take?

Seriously, how much is too much for America to wake up and say, "enough!"?? At this point I should probably give a glimpse of the actual topic of this post...driving under the influence. I just read this article about MLB pitcher Nick Adenhart and three of his friends. I don't follow baseball unless it's Rangers T-ball so the fact that one of the victims was a star-athlete doesn't have much impact on my stance. Probably the only reason we are hearing about the crash on a nationwide circuit is because of the star-power associated.

In case you don't want to read the article, four people, including MLB pitcher Adenhart were broadsided last night by a man driving under the influence of alcohol. As if that's not bad enough, the same man was driving on a suspended license for a previous DUI. He fled the scene but fortunately was later arrested. So let's get this straight: one DUI = slap on the wrist; second DUI + suspended license = three dead kids and a hit-and-run situation.

So I ask again: what is it going to take to get American citizens to get fired up enough to demand harsher punishments for DUI? How many more of our families need to be buried before it becomes real enough for us to do something about it? It seems logical to me that had the original punishment been harsher maybe three kids would be alive and the fourth wouldn't be fighting for his life. If the punishment had been harsher maybe the offender wouldn't have decided again to get behind the wheel of a vehicle after drinking. Maybe.

Lasting Impressions

Words mean things -- a seemingly obvious statement. It's true nonetheless: words mean things. Whether penned or spoken or even thought words have power, influence, impact, meaning. It's easy to think that the only words we need concern ourselves with are those we put down for posterity, in permanence; perhaps too we are conscious of those words that, in their very being, are not nice. But what about the rest? The words that aren't permenant -- mere slips of the tongue in passing conversation; what about those words? Should we also think on these? Consider these? What about the words that aren't inherently mean, hateful, not nice? Should we consider these too? Can these words bruise, wound, knock down as quickly and efficiently as the cruel ones?

The answer of course is in the affirmative. Even these quickly passing, seemingly neutral words can wound. Too often we loose our tongues and let fly thoughts that we fail to recognize as hurtful. It was a joke or not meant in that way. But still it lingers, that comment we hoped was temporal. It bumps around in the psyche of it's recipient. When the long fingers of night creep across the land, those words come out loud and strong to inflict the damage we didn't anticipate.

How many times in Proverbs are we warned that the wise man holds his tongue but the fool fails to realize the need? How many times do we ignore this warning, do we let go and let loose? Perhaps if we thought more and spoke less, held on tighter and sought to impress less, we wouldn't bruise, wouldn't hurt, wouldn't wound each other so frequently, so powerfully. And too perhaps, if tongues were stilled more often, held tight, reined in -- perhaps then we might walk a little closer, might get a little dustier, might look a little more like our Rabbi.

Where I am...

I have a lot to say...tons in fact. Thoughts upon thoughts, words upon words filling my heart, welling up from emotion. I can't say any of them. I don't want to hurt feelings, bruise egos, wound hearts. I don't want to make others doubt themselves (even perhaps when they should) and I don't want to plant fodder that will grow into gossip weeds. That's why my words here have been few and far between. It's difficult, as a word girl, to work through these thoughts and emotions without writing them down. I thought this blog was a place to do just that...but as readership grows so too must the stroke of my censorship pen. I know I could journal...and perhaps I should...but I enjoyed the real-ness of this medium, the here and now and relevance of blogging. Ouch...I enjoyed it...didn't realize I don't any more. Some days I do...I need to get back to those, find those, seek those out (or at least the mindset from which they sprung). So I'll go back to my cave, wrestle with my thoughts and emotions and strive to come back refreshed with ideas that are a bit more neutral -- I'll still post as the bug bites, but if I'm gone awhile you'll know why.

Should read a little first

Found this article after posting my own rambling jumble of thoughts on home schooling. Wonderful and beautiful and true. Doesn't answer all the questions but answers the big one -- shouldn't I do what's best for my own?

Pros and Cons to Homeschooling:Why We Do It

How to school

The problem not a problem because this doesn't require a solution. The situation no, too military-movie immediate The issue no too serious, doesn't need to be on CNN. The thing (that works). Let's do this...

The Thing: where should Jack begin his formal and official school process: in public school or at home?

Thingys no, that just sounds wrong... Things to consider (better):

1. We live in a great school district and are zoned to some of the best schools within that district. These people (I was one of them, remember...) are extremely qualified to teach Jack.
2. Jack is a summer birthday boy. He will be one of the youngest in his class and this could cause serious problems. Add to that the fact that Jack was a preemie and shouldn't have a birthday until late August. While he hasn't shown any developmental delays that are worth mentioning, the "watch-zone" can extend through age 5 for a preemie with minimal complications. We could still see areas where Jack is playing catch-up.
3. Public school (and most private schools for that matter) are not designed for little boys. Truthfully, they aren't designed for most big boys either. For the purposes of keeping order, schools have had to adopt organizational schemes that prevent little boys from exploring the world as God intended them. Inside, at a table, isn't what most little boys need. I'm sure there are exceptions to this but I guarantee Jack isn't one of them.
4. I'm a certified teacher. Surely I have the tools to teach my own child right? I know my parents, who paid for me to obtain those tools, hope so!!
5. I'm a certified HIGH SCHOOL teacher. How in the world am I going to be able to teach my kindergartener?? I don't even know what Kindergarten kids need to know!!
6. Jack thrives on social situations. It's uncanny really. To homeschool him would potentially deprive him of interaction that he not only wants but needs.
7. Based on what I've seen of Jack in other "teaching" situations, he seems to do better with the fewest distractions as possible. If a child acts out or has discipline problems, Jack has problems not watching (and sometimes interacting).
8. I have a toddler. How in the world am I supposed to have school at the kitchen table with little brother playing the role of destructor all day? And if God agrees, Sam won't be the last baby; then what am I going to do with multiple little ones running around?

The final decision: I have no clue. I've been doing research online and attempting to ask people that currently homeschool but I've run into a bit of a blockade. Online research is spotty at best with opinions ranging from a "non-school" approach to a public school at home approach. Some say to find ways to socialize; others say basically "socialization is over-rated". It's becoming difficult to weed out the crazies. Current homeschooling folks seem wary to share. I haven't figured this one out; if I had info that could help you can believe I'd be passing it out, requested or not. I'm seriously leaning to homeschool, just about ready to say "yes" to it BUT there are some big questions that have to be answered before I commit. Namely, education is one of the most important things a person can pursue and I have to ensure that whatever method I choose for Jack this concept is well instilled in him. I'm sure there are plenty of readers who disagree with that statement but he's my kid not yours, so there. Another "must" is I have to make sure that my very social child is stimulated the way he needs; right now church and playgroup are meeting that need, but playgroup will dissolve when his playmates start school. This question is actually easier for me to answer so I'm not as concerned; thanks to organizations like the YMCA and programs like Upward Basketball Jack should have plenty of places to socialize with others. One of the final questions I need answered is pacing; how fast should I go? how fast is too fast? too slow? Up to this point I have taught Jack things that he has shown interest in; sometimes it works, sometimes we have to revisit the idea a little later. I don't want to force Jack to work at a pace that isn't comfortable to him -- isn't that one of the points of homeschool, to be more personalized? But I wouldn't think it's a good thing to finish too early or too late. Hmmmm...still have things to think about. Can you tell I feel a little like Gideon right now? God I know your calling but I need some hard evidence...

Any ideas? Suggestions? Resources? Things I have forgotten or not noticed? It's a good thing I have a while to make this decision...

Which Rat are you?

I've done it! After a rousing viewing of Disney-Pixar's Ratatouille I have developed the next great facebook quiz ap: Which Rat Are You? The choices: Remmie, the soulful, artistic more-of-a-human-than-a-rat rat; Emile, Remmie's larger, somewhat dimwitted yet lovable brother; Remmie's Dad, slightly narrow-minded but possessing a good heart and a love for family; Big-Muscle-Used-For-Persuasion Rat, often an unruly fellow; and last but not least the Clan Rat, numbered in the hundreds yet nameless throughout, loyal, dependable, hardworking.

The ap will have a handful of painfully ambiguous questions like "what's your ideal work environment?" with answers that are so positive it is difficult for anyone to actually determine what's best for them. Each answer will be randomly assigned to one of these characters and after the quiz is completed the answer will pop on the screen. It's brilliance at it's finest.

My results? I'm pretty sure I'm Emile. I know, I know -- I should be Remmie. I mean, there must be something wrong with me if I choose NOT to be the main character right?? Nonethless I think I'd be Emile -- comfortable, a bit naive, loyal to family and authority figures, with the tastebuds of ... well of a rat. Seriously...I'll eat just about anything with no complaints. Of course I have things I prefer but I'm the girl who doesn't really complain about hospital and cafeteria food. I'd make a horrible restaurant critic. All the "end notes" for food and drinks that people talk about are like a foreign land to me. End notes? It's a grape...it barely has A note much less multiple notes!

I'd have this ap up in no time...except for my exceptional lack of knowledge of HTML. One small problem...I'll have to see about working on that -- in between solving the economic crisis and changing diapers.

So there you have it: Which Rat Are You???

Gratitude

Because I often lose sight of my reasons for thanksgiving...a visual list.

For baby roars flying around corners from a little who has found another piece of his voice, found another clue to his place

For small hands wrapped around weed flowers, presenting them with such pride to mama

For off key voices shouting loud in song to God for right teaching

For leader husband willing to go down on knees to comfort babies, scrub floors and teach classes full of waiting eyes that God is power and powerful.

For full and new and enough mercy each morning -- to conquer the battles that lay waiting in shadows. New each day so none has to be stored, none saved for "what-ifs" and "in-case".